That you’re boring. Yes, boring. She can be your lover, your wife, your about to be lover, and she’ll tell you when you have bad breathe (maybe), or that she doesn’t like what you’re wearing (for sure) but she won’t tell you that the reason she’s not kissing and smiling like she did when you first met is because you thought you could relax, now that you had your security sewn up. Well, you can and maybe she won’t complain too much when you act like a self-serving slob not interested in cultivating love, but she won’t want to engage in the kind of hot sex you had when you met. I’m assuming you had hot sex at least once.
The reasons are the same reasons she’s probably told you already, that you don’t talk to her, never invite her anywhere, don’t shower and wash your hair often enough, eat like a pig, never help around the house, never help with the kids, never walk the dog, never, ever surprise her with something romantic. Flowers are a good beginning as long as you say something nice when you give them to her. Chocolate could be good if she loves and eats chocolate, but these are kind of standard and somewhat boring choices unless you include them (extra bonus points) with what she really, really longs for, which are displays of affection whether it’s putting your arm around her or holding her hand, or stopping as you walk by to give her a quick shoulder rub or telling her how lucky you feel to have found her or that she’s beautiful or that…you get the drift. Also, you could really turn her on by helping her at home without complaining. You could make reservations for dinner out, get a babysitter, and take her out and do not talk about boring stuff, talk about her some more, tell her something fun or nice you remember about her, tell her you like what she’s wearing, you like her hair, you love her. You could also take her to a movie or play or dancing, just out.
Just test this, just to see if I know what I’m talking about, you will get a positive response unless you just do it one time and then gripe when she’s not all over you. Then you deserve what you get.
You don’t have anything to lose, except maybe some of your stubbornness. Yes, I’m going to tell her what you like too.